Trauma is a pervasive issue in our society. It is estimated that 70% of people worldwide have experienced some trauma in their lives. Many people have trauma and don’t even know they have it. In this article, I reveal unusual signs of trauma that may be ignored or hard to miss.
1. Negative Emotional Responses Rooted in Trauma
If you have any unresolved trauma surrounding a particular event in the past, a reminder of the adverse event, or any future adverse event, can trigger negative emotional responses such as fear, anger, and defensiveness. The future event itself may be a simple everyday occurrence, but if it registers the same negative emotional responses as if the trauma happened yesterday, you may be dealing with unresolved trauma.
2. Avoidance of Negative Things That Affect You
Another key aspect of trauma, particularly childhood trauma, is the inability to confront things that impact you negatively. This happens because when you were a child, your feelings were not validated, so you learned to avoid them and not to voice them. This can have an impact on all aspects of your interpersonal relationships. If this is not dealt with, over time it leads to general unhappiness, depression, and resentment.
3. Repeating Negative Patterns and Circumstances Surrounding the Event
Another aspect of unresolved trauma is repeating negative decisions or cycles based on old emotional wounds. For example, this may look like negative spending patterns stemming from the trauma of being made fun of for never having enough as a child, causing the adult to overcompensate by overspending, leading to cycles of poverty and living paycheck to paycheck.
4. Overcompensation
This aspect of unresolved trauma comes from the need to take back control over the effects of the traumatic event. It is rooted in a need for control or having the appearance of always being in control at all times to counteract the chaos the traumatic event created. This can create many negative effects and a sense of feeling hollow as eventually you may feel that your life is nothing but a performance.
5. Hypervigilance
If you are overly anxious or cautious and vigilant, hoping that bad experiences do not happen even when there is no reason for such vigilance, you may be dealing with unresolved trauma.
6. Hyperindependence
If you feel the need to always do everything yourself as a necessity, that very act may be rooted in the trauma of not having a support system and having to do everything yourself from a very young age. As an adult, you have learnt that you can’t lean on anyone for support, and you may find it difficult for anyone to care for or support you.
How do you resolve these situations?
- Seek help from a qualified therapist or mental health professional who can get to the root causes of your trauma.
- Commit to overcoming your trauma one day at a time by taking part in therapy or therapeutic activities that ease the stressors and triggers related to your trauma.
- Cultivate a community of support, care, and love with those who affirm, support, and honor you.
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Sources
Benjet C, Bromet E, Karam EG, Kessler RC, McLaughlin KA, Ruscio AM, Shahly V, Stein DJ, Petukhova M, Hill E, Alonso J, Atwoli L, Bunting B, Bruffaerts R, Caldas-de-Almeida JM, de Girolamo G, Florescu S, Gureje O, Huang Y, Lepine JP, Kawakami N, Kovess-Masfety V, Medina-Mora ME, Navarro-Mateu F, Piazza M, Posada-Villa J, Scott KM, Shalev A, Slade T, ten Have M, Torres Y, Viana MC, Zarkov Z, Koenen KC. The epidemiology of traumatic event exposure worldwide: results from the World Mental Health Survey Consortium. Psychol Med. 2016 Jan;46(2):327-43. doi: 10.1017/S0033291715001981.Epub 2015 Oct 29.PMID: 26511595; PMCID: PMC4869975
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